Letter # 100: "Romance"

How do you define romance?
Complex feelings are often hard to put into words. Our struggle with words begins when we're babies and continues on. A toddler can’t talk; it makes gestures in order to describe what to it is beyond words. In a way we are all toddlers when it comes to describing the indescribable. The richness of our physical, mental and spiritual universe is too vast to capture with our puny symbols. We try our best by making up new words, or borrowing them or modifying them, or by speaking in metaphor and parable.
It’s Valentine's Day and so it’s a good time to look at how this day is defined.
Named after several martyrs of early Christendom, the name Valentine was associated with romantic love by Geoffrey Chaucer (1343-1400 CE) in his Parlement of Foules in which he wrote: “For this was on seynt Volantynys day; Whan euery bryd comyth there to chese [choose] his make [mate].”
Romance, as a word, has its roots in the Latin Romanicus meaning “in the Roman style” Originally romantic stories referred to a chivalric adventure but came to mean a love story by 1667.
Romance is deified in Cupid, the Roman god of love. He shot two kinds of arrows: a golden arrow which rendered the victim love-struck, or a leaden arrow which aroused the victim with sexual passion.
Further east, Cupid has an alias - Kandarpa. Lord Krishna says, “Of causes for procreation I am Kandarpa, the god of love…”BG 10.28. But the force of sexual love is holy only if contained: “ I am the strength of the strong, devoid of passion and desire. I am sex life which is not contrary to religious principles, O lord of the Bhāratas.” BG 7.11.
Male and female pairs were made for companionship and happiness. The Holy Koran emphasizes remembrance of “… Him Who hath created male and female.” 92:3. However, the intended happiness often turn sour unless we use the remedy of forgiveness. Matthew 19: 4-5 tells us that Jesus emphasized unity: “And Jesus answered and said unto them, ‘Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, and for this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?”
Guidance on how to make a marriage brim with love and peace was given by the Sikh Guru, Guru Ram Das. He advocated transforming marriage into a spiritual one with God. [Lavan Hymn ]. Sikhs protect that marriage, that faith, by the sword. In this respect, you will notice that, in the picture above, the man, though not overtly a Sikh, certainly endorses that principle; he courageously ensures the protection of his loved one with one hand on his sword.
When we’re at a loss for words as toddlers, parents help us. As we struggle as adults, Teachers and poets fulfill that role:
“The life of man is the true romance, which when it is valiantly conduced, will yield the imagination a higher joy than any fiction.” Ralph Waldo Emerson US essayist & poet (1803 – 1882).

God Bless; Allah Hu Akbar; May The Forces Of The Universe Bring You Harmony; Hare Krishna; Radha-Swami; and Nanak Naam Chardi Kala Tere Bhane Sarbat Dha Bhalla.

I wish to express my gratitude for your comments, which inspire me to carry on writing. Please forgive my fallibilities in presenting this material. Also, feel free to send this message on to someone that you might think would like to receive it. If you do send it on, my only request of you is that you send it as it is, in its entirety, and to not alter or modify any of the text, references or authorship information. Thus you will help to give credit or liability to where they are properly due.
Jas Bhopal
Copyright© 2008
References: "The Holy Bible" Online version; "The Koran" as translated by SV Mir Ahmed Ali 2005 ISBN 0-9761870-0-0); "The Bhagavad Gita As it Is" as translated by Srila Prabhupada ISBN 0-89213-268-X; The Srimad Bhagavatum as translated by Srila Prabhupada ISBN0-89213-259-0; "I Am That. Talks With Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj” ISBN 0-89386-022-0; The Dhammapada ISBN-10:1-84483-344-5; The Sacred Sukhmani ISBN 81-7205-098-4; Wikipedia.